My boyfriend and I have never had sex as we're worried about HIV

DEAR DEIDRE: I LOVE my boyfriend but we have never been intimate because we’re worried about HIV.

Neither of us has had a sexual relationship before. I am 31 and he is 25 and we met on a gay dating site.

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We are now very much in love. We talk every day but we’ve only gone walking together due to the pandemic.

We’ve talked about sex but we’re worried about taking things any further because of STIs, and particularly HIV.

Is there any risk of us catching HIV?

Is it worth getting a test before we start to have a sexual relationship?

DEIDRE SAYS: It would be extremely unlikely you’d have HIV or any STI if you’ve never had sex but some people can be born with HIV if a parent has it.

To be certain, an HIV and general STI test for you both will give you reassurance.

Many people living with HIV lead healthy lives, as it is treatable.

For the latest information go to the Terrence Higgins Trust (, 0808 802 1221).

To avoid spreading coronavirus you should wait to become intimate until after restrictions are eased.

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