I made my girlfriend have an abortion and now I think she hates me

DEAR DEIDRE: THE trust has gone from our relationship since my girlfriend’s abortion.

She got pregnant last year and though it wasn’t planned, she wanted to keep the baby.

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But I told her I wasn’t ready for a family. I felt bad but we both knew the timing wasn’t right.

I’m 35 and she’s 32. We’ve been together for two years and planned to move in together.

But ever since the abortion she’s been down and distant with me.

She’s started messaging a guy she met at work. That’s not a secret. He’s married and she says he’s just a mate.

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They often go out for drinks. She seems really happy around him – more so than with me.

I don’t think she is cheating but I feel uncomfortable about their friendship.

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DEIDRE SAYS: Any abortion, but especially when a woman wants the baby, can be highly traumatic.

She needed a friend for support and an escape from her pain.

Perhaps the reason this bothers you so much is guilt at asking her to have the abortion.

Set your jealousy aside and talk to her. My support pack Looking After Your Relationship should help.

Try relationship counselling. Get support via tavistockrelationships.org (020 7380 1960).

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